A recently released report from Project Justice USA shines a light on failings in the U.S. family court system that tend to disadvantage the most helpless victims. Against the backdrop of this report, titled "Breaking the Silence," Rebecca Zung, Esq., a top 1% attorney and acclaimed negotiation coach, is a leading voice for victim empowerment.
"Breaking the Silence" Report
"Breaking the Silence" surveyed 2,072 family court participants over the past 20 years. Nearly 94% of respondents were mothers, and 92% had survived coercive control or domestic violence. Nearly 90% of families reported having at least one negative outcome following custody determination, and only 1% of respondents rated the family court system as "highly effective" in dealing with domestic violence and child safety issues.
Other key findings:
- 96% of children were negatively impacted by family court proceedings.
- 58% of children experienced safety incidents after custody arrangements were determined.
- 40% of children had thoughts of self-harm or suicide during or after their court experience.
- 72% of respondents said that their allegations of abuse were not thoroughly investigated.
As the legal industry grapples with these concerning findings, Zung continues to lead out in helping victims break cycles of abuse and manipulation. Zung's mission: teach people how to get the upper hand in negotiations with high-conflict or narcissistic individuals and empower people to protect themselves, even when the legal system fails them.
A System Ill-Equipped to Deal with Narcissistic Abuse
"Judges aren't taught how to spot subtle abuse," Zung says. "They are trained to adjudicate facts. But when the narcissist blends charm and manipulation, judges may fall for their ruse, leaving the narcissist's victim on the losing end."
According to Zung, lawyers, too, are often out of their depth when grappling with how to beat a narcissist in family court.
"Lawyers know what works with logical people, but narcissists operate by their own set of rules," said Zung. "That's why so many cases against narcissistic abusers take far longer and cost far more than standard cases. Narcissists delay and deceive. They don't feel guilt or empathy, and they don't want resolution—they want control."
Victims may work through lawyers who are qualified in divorce, but not qualified in helping people divorce a narcissist. As a result, cases drag on, and the narcissist gets everything they want while the victim gets exploited. Some lawyers may even start believing the narcissist's false narrative, dismissing the victim as unstable, dishonest, or paranoid. This only serves to amplify the victim's trauma while derailing justice.
Education Works
According to Zung, the way out for victims starts with education. That's why she is dedicated to helping victims be their own best advocate in a system that too often fails to protect them. She empowers victims through her popular YouTube channel, podcast, and virtual courses, such as "SLAY® Your Negotiation Against a Narcissist" and "Justice Blueprint."
These courses offer specific, actionable strategies for beating narcissists in court. They are supported by coaching, mentoring, and AI technology that has been compared to having a legal strategist by your side around the clock.
Zung's courses help victims of narcissistic coercion and abuse master the following:
Leverage
In her 25 years as an attorney, with the majority of her cases involving high-conflict individuals, Zung came to understand the power of leverage to win against narcissists. Today, she is known as "The Leverage Lawyer," and her SLAY AI® and its related trainings are built around helping people gain the power, influence, and control they need to gain an advantage while mediating with a narcissist.
For example, if a narcissist is driven by their desire for admiration, gaining leverage might mean framing goals as something that would benefit the narcissist's self-image. That way, victims can get what they want while making the narcissist feel like they're winning.
If a narcissist thrives on control, victims can limit the information they share. For example, they might choose not to reveal much about their plans or emotions, which can prevent the narcissist from using this knowledge to manipulate.
Documentation
Evidence wins cases, and Zung's programs provide workbooks and AI tools that help people gather and organize evidence. That means consolidating emails, texts, videos, social media posts, court orders, and financial records on one platform, where they can be accessed at any time. This documentation can then be used to draft correspondence, anticipate the other party's arguments, prepare for different courtroom scenarios, write opening statements, and practice for cross-examinations.
Working with a Lawyer
Zung provides people with screening questions to ask when interviewing potential lawyers, allowing them to find a lawyer who understands narcissism. She also teaches people how to maximize their attorney's efforts.
"An attorney may be an undisputed expert in divorce law, but that doesn't mean they're an expert on your relationship with the narcissist," said Zung. "Only you can provide them with the texts, emails, or videos that expose the narcissist's manipulations and lies. Only you know their history of abuse. Only you know what fuels their narcissistic supply. You can't sit back and wait for the usual court proceedings to play out. You have to take control of your own case, partner with and empower your attorney, and advocate for your own rights."
The Leverage Toolkit
Zung's program is a toolkit designed to support the victim emotionally, mentally, financially, and legally. It enables victims to:
- Set rules for conversations to avoid getting pulled into reactive exchanges.
- Identify the primary control lever opponents use (reputation, children, money) and address it directly.
- Reinforce boundaries consistently, calmly, and without apology.
- Define and stick to "non‑negotiables" in every hearing, exchange, or settlement point.
These strategies apply whether someone is dealing with a narcissistic colleague, a toxic family member, or a manipulative ex‑spouse.
Giving Victims a Voice
Behind the "Breaking the Silence" report are countless manipulative and narcissistic personalities who thrive off of belittling, silencing, and controlling their victims. Zung is helping these victims find their voice by empowering them with the tools, knowledge, and confidence they need to stand up for themselves. That means a brighter future for victims and a brighter outlook for the entire family court system.
About Rebecca Zung
The National Association of Distinguished Counsel named Zung a Top 1% Attorney, and U.S. News designated her as a "Best Lawyer in America." She is a USA Today bestselling author and architect of the SLAY® (Strategy, Leverage, Anticipate, You) negotiation methodology and SLAY® AI® tool for negotiation success. As one of the country's foremost negotiation coaches, she has amassed nearly 60 million views on her YouTube channel. She currently runs the SLAY® High Conflict Negotiation Certified Coach Training, which equips people to become professional negotiation coaches serving both individuals and organizations. To learn more, visit www.rebeccazung.com.
